Monday, April 9, 2012

Coke Zero vs. Diet Coke: NOT THE SAME.

I'm on holiday. Or as you Americans say, vacation. That being said, I have a lot of time for ranting. Consider yourselves forewarned.

So, the other night, I'm in a pub. Thanks to my current tee-total status, I basically have a sum total of two beverage options these days.

The first is lime & soda. I really like a good lime & soda, but ooh boy does it really grind my gears if it is not made correctly. I need exactly the right ratio of lime cordial to soda water. Preferably with a slice of lime, but I can take or leave that. I have been known to ask a bartender if I could make my own in the past... although to be fair, that would have been a vodka lime & soda, and most likely not my first of the evening. ANYWAY. I digress.

The second option currently available to me is Diet Coke. Ooooh boy do I loves me a good cold crisp DC. Tends to be my go-to when I just cannot be arsed with taking the whole 'lime & soda ratio' gamble. "Diet Coke please" isn't that hard to fuck up, is it?

Let me tell you. It is. And it's all thanks to this sneaky interloper: Coke Zero. I FUCKING HATE COKE ZERO.

So, the whole premise behind the existence of Coke Zero is that it tastes like traditional Coca Cola, but without the sugar. Whereas, Diet Coke tastes like, well, Diet Coke. Not regular Coke. DIET COKE.

(why do I feel the need to use shouty caps so much? A therapist would have a field day...)

This post is not about the chemical differences, the sugar content, artificial sweeteners, blah blah blah. You can find all that here if you care. To me, it's about TASTE, people. T. A. S. T. E.

I really dislike the taste of Coca Cola. And, therefore, Coke Zero. I just don't like it. At all. I can tell the difference at first sip between a Coke and a Diet Coke, and I am not happy if I have been served the wrong one. I will complain. As is my right.

Back in the day, the biggest cola-related issue used to be Coke vs Pepsi. Not so anymore, it seems. Although... that would take me on another tangent 'cos Pepsi Max should be illegal. Eww. *ahem*, sorry...

Back to the other night. I ask for a Diet Coke, and what comes to me is clearly either Coca Cola or Coke Zero (I can't tell between the two, and don't care to). So, I send it back. I tell the waitress I ordered a Diet Coke, she apologises, and gets me another one. Here's the thing. The second drink? Same as the first.

At this point, given my stress levels were already fairly high, I couldn't be bothered complaining further. I pushed it aside and drank water. But it got me thinking... do bar staff think these two products are the same? Is Diet Coke in danger of being outrun by this sleek, black and shiny new rival? How will I cope???

As it is, in many shops and cafes now, the fridges are bereft of DC. The Coke Zero bottles and cans have strolled on in and taken over the shelves that are not rightfully theirs. I haz a sad.
Seems I'm not the only one confused

Cut to this weekend. I'm in another dining establishment, and I ask for a Diet Coke. The waitress comes right back out to our table to apologise, and tell me that they are out of DC but, would I like a Coke Zero instead? No thanks, I politely decline, I'll have a Sprite Zero instead. I thanked her for knowing the difference, and she smiled. She knew. She got it.

It's just a damn shame she's in the minority. Is anyone else feeling my pain?

Monday, February 27, 2012

Why I'm Looking for a New Job

Heeeeeeeey, whiners! This seems like a better place to explain what's happening in my work life than Cheaper Than Therapy (which is a desolate place these days). So you all know that I started a new job in December, right? It was going to be a dream job! Work mostly by myself, easy office management work that I can totally do, yadda yadda yadda, right?

What's wrong with my work, you ask?  Well, for one thing, there's not enough to do. Which sounds great, at first.  But I'd really rather be busy at work so the time will pass.  I've spent enough time at work surfing the 'net, reading fan fic, and generally wasting time - so much time that it's lost its novelty. Ridiculous, right?  But other than that, this is also largely accounting work. And I am NOT an accountant.

Also, not having shit to do all day, most every day, means that when things come up that need to get done, I have no motivation to do them. I seem to work better if I'm constantly working. 

I'm also basically chained to my desk from 8:30-4:30 every day. Like, I can't leave for lunch. Or breaks.  If I go to the bathroom (which I refuse not to do), I run the risk of missing a phone call from the ever-elusive boss. If I miss a phone call, I get a lecture about how I should always answer the phone, no matter what.  What would happen if I missed a call from someone?  Gee... maybe he doesn't know we have VOICEMAIL. 

Pretty sure this is what he thinks would happen if I took 20 minutes to go to Subway.

Finally, and quite importantly, my boss is a racist, bigoted, 1 percenter asshole.  I swear to God, he uses the word "negro," makes all sorts of sexist comments, and told a man named Leo Rosenbaum that he couldn't talk because he had an appointment for a circumcision to get to, after which he would don a yarmulke and change his name to Shmuel.  For reals.  I sat there with my mouth agape, and after he hung up, he was like, "That was pretty funny, right?" And I said, "You may have offended him, if he's Jewish."  He just said, "Well, I thought it was funny. I'm funny."

I believe he has anger issues, because he's mean about everyone. He has to wait in line at the bank for two minutes? They're "all idiots and couldn't find their assholes with a flashlight."  

Last week, I told the boss that I thought he'd be better off with a part-time accountant.  That's right, I tried to talk him out of my employment here.  He heard nothing I said, basically, and advised me to enjoy the "down-time." *sigh*

Ultimately, this job is just not the right fit for me.  I don't mind free time, I don't mind getting paid for it. I do mind being a beck-and-call-girl to a racist rich guy.  I can do better than this, even if I get paid less.

Luckily (have we ever had a whine that ended on a high note?), we have a temp accountant in, who is meant to be cleaning up the books (but whom I'm hoping to train at my job), and I have a second interview for an Executive Assistant position (which sounds like a GREAT fit, and I'm trying to be more objective this time around) tonight at 5:15PM, and a phone interview for a different Executive Assistant position tomorrow at 4:30PM.  Hopefully, I can get out of here soon.

Monday, February 20, 2012


Yeah, so this is going to be a short, but extremely frustrated blog post. I need to vent...

This doesn't even cover it...

Picture me: heavy Monday at work; just fed the troops; feeling the need to go defuzz my legs (and other regions, of which I shall not speak...!). I begin to run myself a bath...

This is what I envisage:

Aaaaah! Essential oils and candlelight--the perfect atmosphere for fanfiction...

Sadly, what I envisage is--this evening at least--far from what I get.

I dip my toe into the water to test the temperature... Perfect! Lowering myself into the tub, I make sure I have all of the essentials to hand...

It's worked every single time so far. I'm so careful. I have to be, as my glasses steam up, so I know when I'm in the bath I need to take care!

Obviously, this evening, I didn't take enough care :-(

Yeah, so replace that dude's face with mine, and you know what happened. And, amazingly, I hasten to add, even #Thing1 was surprised that he didn't hear me cuss.

Hell, no!

It was a whimpered "Aaaaaah!", followed by a slightly more forceful "Oh no!" that fell from my lips. You whiny people would have been proud of me *nods vigorously*.

My iPod fell into the bathwater. It is dead. It has languished in the airing cupboard of revival, having been blasted with the warm air of hairdryer greatness. And now it's sitting in a dish of rice grains, in an attempt to draw out the last dregs of moisture.

I'm not terribly hopeful :-(

This post was brought to you from the UK by CC x

Saturday, February 11, 2012

I Want. But I Can't Have. Yet.

Hello petals! It's been a while since anyone's had a good whine here...

*blows away cobwebs*

This weekend, many of my twi-friends got the chance to get their grubby little paws on the Breaking Dawn, Part One DVD, in all it's variations. It has been released in America & Canada... where a large number of my luvvies reside.

However.... those of us in other areas, New Zealand, Australia, the UK, etc? No DVDs for us yet.

I can't speak for others (or am too lazy to wiki it) but in New Zealand the release date is March 15th. This makes me a little sad.

I KNOW, I KNOW. I got to see the film in the cinema before everyone else. I've been on the fun side of international release date variations. BUT you know what? This is my post and imma whine if I want to. I saw Breaking Dawn ONE DAY before everyone else, so I'd get it if we had, you know, a week's delay, or something.... but five weeks? COME ON.

Because my tweeps are such AMAZEBALLS people, loads and loads have offered to buy DVDs and post them to me. Here's the thing. American DVDs won't work in New Zealand DVD players, thanks to a little invention called DVD REGION CODES. This is something I learned when I lived in the UK, and suddenly couldn't play DVDs from home.

So, I thought I'd turn my Breaking Dawn whine into a positive. They say you learn something every day. If you didn't know about region codes, it's your lucky day!

Basically, these regions exist so that film distributors can control elements of a release, content, etc, for different areas of the world. DVD players sold in different areas of the world will only play DVDs from certain regions. Take a look at the back of any DVD on your shelf. There'll be a little number indicating the region, like this:

My Eclipse DVD
There are exceptions, multi-region players, ways to get around this. But for the great majority, we're restricted to buying DVDs from the region we live in.

I stole this picture from the wiki page linked above:

Yup. Pretty, but a little annoying. So, I'm a '4', most of you are '1's and '2's.

So there you have it! A wee education lesson for you. I really hope all of you who have the DVD are enjoying it, and enjoyed the sneak peek of BD2 that you got to see... that the rest of us then saw online (shh).

Ooh! Another thing. Wanna see my cute new kitten? I posted all about him HERE. Check it out.