Just give me some money already!

At the start of last year I started a postgraduate diploma and eventually Masters Degree in premature baby nursing awesomeness, (that's not actually what its called but for the sake of not boring you to death lets just go with it) The hospital where I work funded the first year of the diploma and all was good.  I got way better marks than I ever did at Uni, (Or College for my American friends) the first time around and things were great. 

Until this year. 

I applied for the second year funding and skipped off on my merry way to wait for the confirmation letter.  But no.

 We regret to inform you that your application for funding has been unsuccessful.  

Ummm say what now? WTF???

Please email the below address if you wish to be placed

 on the waiting list should others pull out. 

Umm yes please. 

I'm still on that bloody wait list.

Just to kick me when I'm down there are only 3 of us enrolled in the second year and the other 2 got full funding. Fuck me.

Since then I have applied for three Scholarships, which took around 15 pages of application, 5 pages of essay, 2 character references, and the promise of either a kidney or your first born. I'm still waiting to hear.

Then I talk to my boss (who is a bitch of the highest order) who informs me that there is a good chance the Trust may pay for it.  Turns out no, no they won't. Bastards.

So here I am just over a week til the first day of the semester starts and I have no money to pay the tuition fees. I would pay out of my own pocket but money is pretty tight in our house at the moment and no matter how much I trim the grocery budget, I'm not going to magically find and extra $4000.

I have applied for a student loan (money you borrow from the government and pay back over a million years at a miniscule amount each week), but am reluctant to use it. I was kinda hoping for some free money like everyone else......

Could someone please give me some money already, anyone, please? 

The icing on the cake is that the whole reason I am completing my Masters degree is so I can get my dream job.  Nurse Practitioner.  We have 8 on out unit and a position only becomes available if someone leaves or retires.  You get on the job training, which the hospital pays for, and its what I have been dreaming about for the last 8 years.  They only offer the training if they are going to follow it up with a job offer, and in the time I have been here its been offered twice. 

They are offering the training in March and I am not yet qualified to even apply.

Some other bitch is going to get my dream job and there is nothing I can do about it.  Oh, and I still have no money.

FML